LOSE IT!...Your fear and doubt

Our church is doing a series called "Lose it"...pounds, attitudes, excuses, etc. etc. So I have been praying asking God to show me what is it, besides constantly maintaining weight and good diet, that He wants me to lose in my life so that I can continue to gain His very best. I hear a still, small voice say three words to me, " fear and doubt".

Okay, Lord...I hear you. I have always struggled with fear, since I was a little girl and have really been good at kicking fear in the face as of late. But only recently have I discovered that doubt is an issue for me. Yet another wonderful attribute of being human :-) Everyday, like taking my medicine, I have about 40 scriptures that I read in regards to healing. I have memorized 16 of them so far and plan to tuck the rest of them away in my heart too. So many of these particular scriptures talk about believing and not doubting. For example, Mark 11:22,23, " Have faith in God. For assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ' Be removed and be cast into the sea,' and does not DOUBT in his heart, but BELIEVES that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says." This is just one example of so many. Chad and I have been talking to mountains for a long time and for some reason they continue to feel like mountains...big and heavy. It would be so great to be able to just speak to a mountain and it move as opposed to using every muscle in our bodies, just trying to even budge it an inch...I mean I am pretty buff, but come on! God's Word is all the muscle we need, all we have to do is not doubt and believe.

I believe that God is for me, I believe that God wants to heal me, in my mind that is...but in my heart, well I am questioning that as of late. If I really didn't have any doubt in my heart then I believe that fear would have no place. That's why fear and doubt go hand in hand to me. Certainly my heart would have the power to override my mind...right? This soul and spirit stuff is tricky business.

After spending 5 hours in the ER yesterday experiencing multiple new things in my physical body, crying in discouragment and anger against myself for feeling defeated and just pretty much at that place, where I don't come to that often, of just wanting to give up...I realized that fear and doubt are the trees that produce that fruit in my life. I repent Lord! Totally not the fruit that I want to be producing.

When I got out of bed this morning, like pretty much every morning, the words out of my mouth were, " Holy Spirit, I submit myself to You today", but then I added something new..., " I will not doubt You, I will believe." I just kept saying it out loud over and over again. Maybe I should write a rap song and then it will stick! Here's what I know, that if we can overcome in our minds, 2 Timothy 1:7, " For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.", then it will produce faith and belief and not fear and doubt in our hearts. The only way to do this is to renew our minds, constantly, because we forget oh so quickly.

So, now you know what I need to lose...what is God saying to you?