Wow...can I just say wow? Since my last post on Monday, it has felt like all hell has broke loose! Coincidence? Until this morning, I wasn't able to answer that question with a no without hesitation. Just to recap the week...Tuesday through Thursday I could not pick up my head because of severe vertigo. Thursday through today, on top of the vertigo, spasms throughout my whole body and from my neck up, including my face, loss of sensation and the feeling as though I am paralyzed and nerve pain and burning in the same location, massive breathing issues and horrible weakness through out my whole body.
So why am I telling you all of this, it's so encouraging, right? I am sharing with you the details because you need to understand what kind of faith it takes for us to be where we are right now. Yesterday was our 10 year anniversary. It was spent on the phone with doctors and having a severe allergic reaction to a medication (that we should not have taken and we knew it, the flesh is so weak!). The awesome thing is that my mom took the boys for the night and they just came back about an hour ago. Chad and I sat here and literally cried out to God for a miracle. We were and are so desperate for Him to show Himself to us. I went to bed feeling a little less tormented in my mind, but not so much in my body.
This morning, I wake up crying because my mind had convinced me that I could not get out of the bed because of what my body is feeling. Here's where the good part comes in (I can hear you saying. thank You Lord). Chad and I began talking out our weaknesses, our deep down doubts and fears...to the extent of believing does God really exist (yep, seriously, don't judge us)! We got to a moment where it was silent and in rang a text from a mighty woman of God and she said, " Praying for healing and breakthrough for you this morning..." I'm not kidding when I say, I started to cry and I threw the phone at Chad and said, " Tell me God doesn't exist!" It was perfect timing. From that moment, we started to pray in the spirit. We poured it all out and asked God to completely once and for all deliver us from our fears and our doubt. We asked God to help us to draw a line in the sand. We know that God did something in that moment that we will forever talk about and that will forever aid Him in setting people free, through us, from fear and doubt.
So how does my body feel? Answer: Like I should be in a hospital somewhere doped up on major drugs until this is all over. But, I got out of bed :-) Honestly, I couldn't write until this moment because I was allowing my mind and my spirit to take a back seat to my body. Now, my mind and spirit are back in the place that they should be! Fixed on Jesus. We are learning to praise God and give thanks in everything.
Here's the Word of God for today to us...James 1:4, " Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." If you keep reading through vs 8 it talks about asking for God's wisdom and believing, not doubting, when we ask so that we will not be an unstable people.
We are all blown around every time the wind changes. It's time for that to stop. It's time for us to be "mature and complete, not lacking anything". So perseverance must be allowed to finish it's work in us. I don't know what's coming, but I know Him. Enough said.
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