Live Like You're Dying

 Hey everyone! So it's been a while since I've written anything, at least for the public eye. I have found myself having countless sleepless nights with all kinds of things rolling around in this spirit and brain of mine. My life is an absolute circus right now, in a great way, so when my head hits the pillow at night, I use up every second of sleep. I figure being wide awake at all different hours of the night might just be a neon sign and extra push from God that I need to get out what's in me. 

Those of you who know me well, know that when it comes to the things of God, I'm pretty vocal and confident about who He is and who I am in Him. I've never had great confidence in myself, really ever and still don't, but I do have confidence in who He is in me. When He speaks, I listen. When He says move, I move. When He says write, I write. I am a walk by the Spirit of God type girl because #IwouldntsurviveeverydayifIwasnt!  I'm not even sure blogs are still in style these days or if podcast and YouTube channels are the new fad. But this is where God started me and gave me a place to speak so here I am for those who He wants to see and hear. 

To get to the point of my post today...I've been following this young girl, Brooklyn's Journey Home, on Facebook for about a month. This sweet soul has been in a battle for her health for a long while and as of January of this year the doctors had nothing left to offer her. She decided that it was time to stop fighting the process of dying and embrace her journey home to be with Jesus. She's basically the bravest person I know right now and I don't even know her personally. She is in the midst of hospice care at home and just walking out the process of her body dying physically. Seems so morbid, but not to her. She has put out many posts full of truth and her faith in Jesus seems to never waver. She knows she's weak but in her weakness she knows He is strong and she is relying on Him to usher her in to eternity with faith and peace on her feet. She realizes we are all dying, she's just dying a little quicker than most. 

Being faced with so many health challenges and still on the daily having to push through things to stay on my feet, I can in some very small way relate to Brooklyn. You see, she's learned in her journey how to live like she's dying because she is physically dying faster than most. She's learned how to hang on to joy and peace while going through some major trials and still live in the midst of dying. This is what drew me to her story because even though I'm not physically on my death bed right now, I thought I was going to be a few times in the last 18 years and I have had to learn this very principal. Live like you're dying. 

Until I encountered Brooklyn's story, I didn't know how to quite say it in words, but there it is. I realize there is this unseen balance that there has to be between looking to the future and living out every day as if it's our last. I don't know how to do this perfectly and probably never will but I want to live like I'm dying whether it's today or 50 years from now. I want to be intentional with all the things in my life. There are days I go to bed and think, "God, please let me wake up tomorrow because I want to do better with the things you've given me and I didn't do well with them today!" I totally get it. Especially with young kids...#survivalmode...as a mom, I don't ever feel like I'm making a difference in the daily scheme of things. But just like when you are trying to get in shape physically, what is it that every trainer with tell you? Consistency...just keep getting up and doing what you know is right. Just show up and you will eventually see the results. 

All Jesus requires of us weak humans is to just show up. If we draw near to Him, He will draw near to us (James 4:8). We have to be able to say yes to Him every day in order to live like we are dying. Do you want to make a mark in the world? Say yes to Him. Do you want to make a mark on your children? Say yes to Him. Do you want to make a mark at your workplace, with your family and on and on? Say yes to Him and He will help you to live like you're dying. 

Brooklyn has figured out how to laugh and smile in the face of death. Why? Because God isn't just some mythical being that she's been told about. God is a real being that is living and active in her life and eternity is real. Who wouldn't be excited to trade a broken body for a completely whole one and life eternally? I want to be more like that. I have gotten much better at it over the years but to be honest I waver in my excitement of the unknown. I love what I can see and feel and touch and do right now on this earth even though my body struggles. God is good and He's been good to me. I have to be better at trusting this goodness and know that what He has given me here is just a taste of the goodness that I'll know in eternity. I can't be afraid to live like I'm dying because I'm afraid to die and neither can you. Isaiah 41:10,"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."  

God needs us to live passionately and live awake! Those of us who know Him, it's our mission to live this way so others will want to know Him! I am so grateful for a person like Brooklyn who can say yes to Jesus and be used by Him despite her fears so that I can benefit from her walk with Him! 2 Corinthians 1:3-4," All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us."

Living like we are dying requires a consistent posture of submission to the Holy Spirit. How do we do that? It's as simple as waking up everyday and saying, " Holy Spirit, I submit to You." As you do this, He begins to speak and your relationship with Him will grow into something you could have never done on your own. Your life will become full of purpose before you can even realize how full it is. I am a living testimony of this. I went from a very dark place of deepest pain and doubts to a life driven by the Holy Spirit and full of joy, peace and purpose and I don't think I'm even close to fulfilling everything God wants from me! 

I say all this to say, it doesn't matter where you are in your walk with Jesus! All you have to do is start showing up. Start saying yes and let Him take over. Submitting to Him is the only way we can live like we are dying and still have life!