Breaking Through the Flesh

I admit I feel a little like what Audry Assad says in her song " Breaking Through" this morning. Here are some of the lyrics:

I am a blind man trying to find the way
A deaf man with my ear to the ground
Just listening for what You say

I've got no voice to sing the songs
Written by the prophets on the subway walls
The kingdom is a golden table and we are beggars all

Are these just some words that I say aloud?
Is this just the sun breaking through the clouds?
Oh, I know it's more and I know somehow that
Heaven is breaking through
And it's You, it's You, it's You, it's You, You

I've wandered deserts looking for a sign
A wild flower in a valley low
Just reaching for the light

I have no place to lay my head, no sanctuary of my own
The kingdom waits with open arms
For pilgrims headed home

(I am a blind man trying to find the way)
I'm looking for
(I am a blind man trying to find the way)
Heaven is breaking, heaven is breaking
(I am a blind man trying to find the way)
Heaven is breaking through

Heaven is breaking, heaven is breaking
(I am a blind man trying to find the way)
Heaven is breaking through
Oh, heaven is breaking, heaven is breaking
(I am a blind man trying to find the way)
Heaven is breaking through

Heaven is breaking, heaven is breaking
(I am a blind man trying to find the way)
Heaven is breaking through
And it's You, it's You, it's You, it's You, yeah
It's You, it's You, it's You, You

I am a blind man trying to find the way

To break it down, I have really been dwelling on this subject of freedom completely in my flesh. I know that God has had me on this journey of setting me free in my mind and in my spirit and my thinking has been that my flesh has to follow suite. It has to align itself with what God says in the spirit, which is freedom, healing the whole gamut. I had concluded that this has not happened because God is keeping me to Himself to prepare me for what's ahead. What He is calling me to do after this is all said and done. But then I question, am I really doing everything I'm supposed to do to allow my flesh to really be free. Is there something in my flesh that I need to be delivered from? My spirit is freer, but is my flesh not free because there is deliverance that needs to happen that I am just not aware or knowledgeable about? I'm really praying about this. 

My new plea to God everyday is, "Jesus, please set my flesh free." I love God's Word because it always breaks through my confusion. Ephesians 6:12, " For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." I have been wondering, okay, is the battle for my flesh just a consequence of living in this world or is it truly something spiritual that I need to be delivered from. Well, the Word says, it's not flesh and blood that we battle, He sent His son to set us free from that. So it is spiritual, there is something that has taken a hold of my flesh that is causing this physical battle and I need Jesus to reveal the root and set me completely free. 

I am praying that God will continue to reveal all the roots in my life that could be causing this I am always asking God how did it root itself in me and will He continue to give me the openness to be able to grab hold of whatever He reveals. Not only do I want to be free, I NEED to be.

The Truth About Dying

The other day I had this thought that just will not leave me, so I figured I should blog about it so that it will stop whirling around in my head! I can't really remember where this thought originated from except for this whole theme of dying to myself etc. Anyway, I digress ;-)

I am ashamed to say that I have never been the best at being very evangelistic. I'm working on that. I am not an intentional evangelist anyway. I've reached a lot of people just by being relational, but not just by out right telling people how it is, unless it's just absolutely necessary in that moment, you know what I'm saying.

As I have been learning to die gracefully to myself I had the thought that I realize why there are so many lost and unchurched people in this world. A lot of people are just afraid to lose their lives. They are fearful of dying physically already and then they start learning about Jesus, who requires them to lay down their lives while walking the earth to serve Him and it just doesn't seem like the most appealing way to live, right? No wonder people run from God. The truth is that Jesus does require that we die to ourselves in order to serve His greater purpose. But what most people don't get far enough to know is the benefits of laying down their lives for such an amazing God.

There are countless scriptures that show us how rewarding taking up our cross daily can be but the one that is really ministering to me this morning is one that was passed along to me by sister-in-law (thanks sis, perfect timing ;-)

Philippians 3:10-11 (Amplified version), " [For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope], that if possible I may attain to the [spiritual and moral] resurrection [that lifts me] out from among the dead [even while in the body]."

When we die to ourselves, we are intentionally saying, " I want to know you God more than life itself." When we do that, yes, we may share in His suffering but we also get to share in His resurrection, EVEN WHILE IN THE BODY!  Sign me up! There are so many benefits to laying down our lives for God and the one that my focus is on is obviously my body being resurrected while still on this earth. Now I am not dying to myself just so I can take advantage of His goodness, I am learning to die to myself because that's what He wants me to do. He keeps revealing His promises to me as I do this.

I told a friend the other day, while we were talking about this subject of God wanting us to die to ourselves, that I have every reason walking through what I have been walking through to totally deny God and to not trust Him at all. But all I can do, as I choose to die to myself, is love Him more and trust Him more than I ever have because of all the promises and rewards that come from just letting Him be God. He is showing Himself to me everyday and I have more life and joy than ever before in my relationship with Him. My cup runneth over!!!

I'll leave you with this today to meditate on...Psalm 18:28-30, " You, O Lord, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light. With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall. As for God, His way is perfect; the Word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in Him."

We have to surrender to Him and die to ourselves and He will be there for us and we can live the most rewarding life. Every promise is ours and unlike the promises the world throws around, His are true and never return void. I am living proof of this, just like so many of you. I'd say that's worth dying for.

A Second Chance

Okay, so maybe it's just me who is just now getting this revelation. I was reading to Sam out of his Jesus Story book Bible this morning. It's a great book with all the stories in the Bible from the beginning to the end kid style and wording...it's fun! Anyway this morning Sam and I were reading out of Genesis, the story of Creation. And it dawned on me. We spend so much time using Adam and Eve's sin to justify why our world isn't perfect. Why there is everything bad under the sun. Sickness and disease. We say, " Well, we live in a fallen world and that's just the consequence of our sin or how sin originated." I've said it too.

What struck me this morning was that, yes, we do live in a fallen world, but God, in His amazing love and mercy gave a second chance named Jesus. Hello! He said, " You know what, Adam and Eve didn't do so well, but I love my people so much and so here is my very own Son/My Word in flesh, that I will send to redeem you from sin. Who will bear all of your sickness and disease and who will DIE for your sin so that you can live in freedom like I intended from the very start."

1 John 4:10, " THIS IS LOVE: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins."

His Son was the Word in flesh. Psalm 107:20, " He sent His Word and healed them, and delivered from their destruction." He sent His Son/His Word to redeem and heal us and save us from this fallen world that we seem to give more glory to than Him.

Don't you see? Yeah, we live in a fallen world, but we just live in it, we are not of it. God gave us a second chance to not fall into temptation and we throw it back in His face every time we sin or cast away all the promises that He clearly laid out for us. We grieve Him when we don't trust Him. He sacrificed a lot for us to have a chance to live that life that He originally intended for us. And no, God isn't a conditional God, He still loves us unconditionally even when we don't trust Him or walk with Him like we should. But He loves us so much that I really do believe He gets disappointed like a parent with a child. For example, Parker with potty training...when Parker has an accident, I don't stop loving him because he messed up, but I get disappointed because I know he can do better. I get disappointed because I have done everything that I know to do to set him up for a win in this area.

Same thing with us and God. He has set us up for a win in this world by giving us His living and active Word. When we don't use it, I believe it grieves His Spirit because He loves us so much.

I think I will take that second chance, that do-over by walking out that living Word and staying in constant relationship with Him. I'm not ashamed of that, I need a second chance and here again, God is showing me how much He really loves me.