Peace and Envy but then there's Righteous Indignation

Proverbs 14:30, " A heart at PEACE gives life to the body, but ENVY rots the bones."

Peace: Freedom from any strife or disagreement.

Envy: a feeling of discontent or covetousness with regard to another's advantages, success or possessions. 

In my constant quest to learn what my part is in this whole healing process, I continually ask God to reveal the things in me that are keeping me from fulfilling that process the way it should be done. It's really hard to have peace with your body when you disagree with what it's feeling in your spirit. I don't completely have peace because I don't have freedom from strife and discord from what my body is going through. In my heart, there are days, when I have peace and it does give life to my body like the Word says it will. But here's my question: Can I have peace in my heart and at the same time not be content with what my body is doing because I know it's not what God's Word says and it's not God's best for my life? Is this envy or just not settling for anything less than what God has promised in His Word? 


Well the definition above of envy tells me that I have two things going on in me. Envy and something we call Righteous Indignation. I don't want to walk around with envy, discontentment or covetousness in my heart, I want peace so that there will be life in me. I don't want to rot my bones because I envy those around me who can do what they are called to do completely. God has revealed some envy in me and I am repenting of that. But here's the other side:
  
 Righteous Indignation: Anger without guilt


I do believe while I do have to repent of envy, the true definition of envy, I have something else in me called faith and belief in God's Word which makes me discontent with anything less than what He has said.  Angry without guilt. I am angry at the enemy for stealing from me those things that are rightfully mine as a child of God. There's a big difference between the two. I just have to make sure to allow one to keep me moving forward and the other has to be cut out of my heart. 

Man this process is so painful sometimes. Just when I think I can't be any more broken, more is revealed to be broken of! So while, with great tears, I have repented of envy in my heart, I am grateful that He doesn't condemn me and that He has given me that fighting spirit so that I can overcome and not settle. 


I am standing on God's Word and holding Him to it. It's my right because I am His and He is mine. It's your right to.